0162. WHEN I SAY, "I AM A CHRISTIAN"

Eventhough this poem has been there for a long time, it still moves me every time I read it.

WHEN I SAY, "I AM A CHRISTIAN"

When I say, "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting, "I’ve been saved!"
I'm whispering, "I get lost!
That's why I chose this way"

When I say, "I am a Christian"
I don't speak with human pride
I'm confessing that I stumble—
Needing God to be my guide

When I say, "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong
I'm professing that I'm weak
And pray for strength to carry on

When I say, "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success
I'm admitting that I've failed
And cannot ever pay the debt

When I say, "I am a Christian"
I don't think I know it all
I submit to my confusion
Asking humbly to be taught

When I say, "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect
My flaws are all too visible
But God believes I'm worth it

When I say, "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain
I have my share of heartache,
Which is why I seek His name

When I say, "I am a Christian"
I do not wish to judge
I have no authority...
I only know I'm loved

Used by Permission
Copyright 1988 Carol Wimmer

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0161. The Black Breaded Bible Man

I made my mind to see this show when I saw the advertisement a few months back. You could also say I am lazy. This is the faster way to understand Dr. MacKay.

The drama was written by Taiwaners. I couldn't tell whether it is good or bad 'cause my understanding of music is still limited. On the other hand, I was amazed by the stage and the actor. The stage used several U shape platforms, which have adjustable hight on either side of platform. It used different hight to create different views such as in boat and mountain side. The actor who portraits MacKay is a Caucasian and is popular lately in New York. Most of his lines or singing is in Taiwanese except a small part. His pronunciation of Taiwanese is not so bad in the drama.

I feel that I am not taking serious and faithful to God after watching this show. I am hoping I will truely know God and follow faithfully.

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0160. Green Breeze Chateau

Today, it is off-site meeting. We went to Green Breeze Chateau, Tao Yuan store. I was surprised by the backyard. It certainly doesn't feel like in Taiwan.

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0159. Business Trip

My leader sent me a chat message and told me that I should prepare for a business trip. I didn't get full details until the next day. Basically, there was an urgent usability test. After negotiation, half of the team was assigned to support this test. All the preparation had to be done within two weeks. Preparation included pre-arranging test subjects, device preparation, travel arrangement etc. One member was assigned to fly Japan, along with other teams' members. Another member and I were assigned to fly local office in North America. I was not excited because all the rush and I already been there last year.

The Wednesday before we left for the testing, we were afraid of short of subjects. So I was re-assigned to fly Europe office. This meant the other memeber and I were along to do the experiment alone. I also had to change travel arrangment and asked support from Europe office within three days. I remember all of us couldn't left office on the Friday until after 10.30PM. It was because we had to get everything ready that day, especially I was the first to fly out and started the experiment first.

At the end, the trip was successful. Thank God for that. I appreciated to go somewhere I never been. The only pity is that since I only had one week and the flight were fully booked, I didn't get any free day on my own. Oh well, let's hope for the next time.

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0158. Mr. Mark Bakery

A friend introduced the multi-grain bread from Mr. Mark bakery a while ago. Bread is not my first choice of food. But I love multi-grain bread after trying it. Now, Mr. Mark bakery opened a store nearby where I live. I purchased some when I passed by a few days ago.

Multi-grain bread is more expensive than the regular ones. I prefer them, besides good taste, mainly because nuitrition. Multi-grain bread usually has many ingridents that we don't normally eat and more than ten kinds of them. It certainly balance my nuitrition, especially I dine out all the time.

Besides eat with milk or coffee, I also eat at lunch or dinner. Two piece of thick bread with pre-made package from MacKay Hospital is a good portion for lunch or dinner.

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0157. Rainboots

I was looking for something to wear during raining day. This is because I walk to work most of time. I don't want to wear good shoes in the raining day. Too much water will shorten shoe life, especially shoes I like.

Early this year, I found a pair of rain boots. The height is about my mid-calf, which is a good height. The big different from those plastic working boots or traditional yellow raining boots is style. It still made by plastic materials but with a little heel and pretty prints. So ladies can wear them for work as well. I enjoy it a lot during raining days. People would ask me where did I get them. I found it so convenient. Not only I can wear in the raining day, also when I cleaning the balcony.

The same company also made a shorter height version. I do have quite a few friends wearing shorter height boots. But I found it is not good for me because I walk a lot and fast. Heigher boots is better.

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0156. Millet Paintings

I spent the whole Saturday on viewing Millet paintings, espacially "Les Gleanuses Salon" and "The Angelus". It seems like this is the only chance we will see those paintings outside of Musee d`Orsay, Paris. I have to say it is worthy to spend 250 bucks, even though there is long wait inline. There are paintings from Millet and the related painters.



I am not going into all the details of Millet and the show itself. I am only going to write my thoughts on four paintings.

Les Gleanuses Salon (The Gleaners)


Year: 1857
Paint: Oil on canvas
Size: 83.5 x 111 cm
Location: Musee du Louvre, Paris

This painting not only lets me think about Ruth and Boaz , but also reminds me work hard, which both the Lord and apostles reminded us this as well.

The Angelus


Year: 1857-59
Paint: Oil on canvas
Size: 55 x 66 cm
Location: Musee d`Orsay, Paris

There is something deep within me which hard to describe when I see this painting. I thought about pray in every situation not just heard the evening bells. It is calling and looking up to the Lord at any given time. It also reminds me our pastor mentioned , in our Tuesday Bible study, that God takes over a place starting from prayers. Revival starts at breaking and wrestling in the prayer.

Shepherdess with her flock


Year: 1864
Paint: Oil on canvas
Size: 81 x 101 cm
Location: Musee d`Orsay, Paris

I enjoy this painting a lot but I could not tell why.

Spring



Year: Spring at Barbizon, 1868-73
Paint: Oil on canvas
Size: 86 x 111 cm
Location: Musee d`Orsay, Paris

It gives the feeling of new life and new start. The rainbow tells us that the sky will clear up after rain stops. No matter how difficulty life is, it will pass one day. God said there will never cover the earth with flood. The rainbow is the proof and His promises never change.

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0155. The Snow Show

Last Saturday morning, I went to the breakfast shop around the corner as usual. I flipped through newspaper while enjoying my brunch. At the entertainment section, there was a post about show grabbed my attention. I scaned throught the content. Be honest, I have no memories of what it was said on the paper, but SNOW. But it did persuade me to purchase the ticket the next day. The price was not cheap, comparing to the concert I attened. Because of the price, I chose the seat on the second floor.

I rushed from work to The National Theater on Thursday night. It's very rare to hear music playing before the show starts. The music was already playing, kind of announcing what was coming. I think it also helpled audience get into the show mood. I looked around me. There were many white, small retangular paper lying around, very SNOW like. On the first floor, I saw an unual short wall behind the front row. The stage was in mid-night blue. I anxiously waiting for the show to started. But something disturbing was happened. A group of ladies around me were chatting merrily before the show. They were so into their coversation that didn't even notice the show started, which was really annoyed.

The entire show is acting with music and some singing. I am not fully understanding the story. My interpretation is presenting audience the relationship between two people and people around them. But what put a smile on my face is at the break time. Before the break, they got the cotton-made spider net all over the first floor. During the break, they come out to play with audience, climbing between rows of chairs, spreading waters, etc. After the show, there were many balls, large or small, to play with, and never ending picture taking. That was a fantastic evening. I would recommend to go if they come again.

ps. In the program guidebook, this group influences some performing of Cirque du Soleil, which one of my favorite show groups. And I was surprised to find out Cirque du Soleil would come to Taiwan perform next year!

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0154. Days With Many Things Came

I keep having something happening after I returned from my vacation at Vancouver. I sent my computer to fix because hard drive has broken track last month. Praise the Lord, it was broken at OS, not data sectors. Then I suddenly couldn't find my flash drive which has tax return information. I found it later that day after scaring myself. Computer at work was not running smoothly last week. Some files couldn't access properly. So I sent to MIS for check and the result is the same as my computer, broken tracks. This morning, I couldn't find my wallet, which also have my employee ID. I still have no clue where it is. If I couldn't find the wallet, I am losing NT$3000. Also after my vacation, there is no break in my work. I smell work direction change two weeks ago. Even though it is not confirmed yet, we are getting busier than before.

I remember Pastor Tsao said a few weeks ago, that God always let him very busy at certain period of time, like everything comes all at same time. Maybe I am in the same situation as well. I admit that I am feeling low recently. I think it is because lots of work to do and also affected by someone else. I was affected by our team leader, who is under great pressure. I didn't deal with this feeling low. All I focus was finishing work early to go home. Today, I was sharing with a sister. She reminded me to be still in the Lord. Yes, be still, what I need to practice right now.

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0153. 40 Years

I went to The King's Singers concert last night. I had their collection CD last year through someone else. Their songs are from classical to pop. Their voices are nice. So I didn't want to miss their concerts in Taipei this year! They have two concerts in Taipei this year, with different songs. I want to attend both but I have to give up the Jazz I want to hear since I have church meeting at same time. I am glad at least I still have a chance to watch live concert. Even though this is only pure human voices, they still have funny physical acts based on the songs they sang. Those acts made us laugh. They also surprise us by singing Chinese songs, though it is not completed understood what they are singing.

I notice that they are a 40-years-old vocal group while reading their story. This year happens to be their 40th year. Even thought they do have member change several times, but a 40-years-old pop group is very rare in the history. This reminds me that ShenKun Church just celebrated their 40th year and Grandma Taylor spent her 40th year in ShenKun as well. Moses' three 40 years also pop into my mind. I believe Moses' last 40 years and Grandma Taylor's 40 years are getting God's approval. Moses was very humble in his last 40 years, like a sheep-warrior. He was totally obedient to God, which is why he had a victorious life. Grandma Taylor gives her best time of life to God and faithfully stays in ShenKun 40 years. I believe those are make God smile.

The same 40 years but different rewards. Just what said in the "Purpose Driven Life", we must treat the days on earth is a guest so we will not too attach to whatever on earth. This is what I need to ponder on more deeply.

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0152. [Music Share] Total Priase

This is another song I have been listening a lot, Total Praise. This version is sang by Avalon. I am not sure this is a traditional hymn but I can not help to keep listen over and over again though the words are simple. Maybe this is because I need those words lately :)

Total Praise

Lord, I will lift, mine eyes to the hills
Knowing my help is coming from You
Your peace, You give me in time of the storm

You are the source of my strength
You are the strength of my life
I lift my hands in total praise to You

Amen, Amen
Amen, Amen
Amen, Amen
Amen, Amen

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0151. [Music Share] Before the Throne of God Above

Chris Rice is one of my favorite gospel singer. I have his intrumental album of hymns. Recently, he published another hymn album. This time, he sang instead just play. I just heard this song and crab the lyrics on the net. Can't wait to share :)

Before the Throne of God Above

Before the throne of God above
I have a strong and perfect plea.
A great high Priest whose Name is Love
Who ever lives and pleads for me.
My name is graven on His hands,
My name is written on His heart.
I know that while in Heaven He stands
No tongue can bid me thence depart.

When Satan tempts me to despair
And tells me of the guilt within,
Upward I look and see Him there
Who made an end of all my sin.
Because the sinless Savior died
My sinful soul is counted free.
For God the just is satisfied
To look on Him and pardon me.

Behold Him there the risen Lamb,
My perfect spotless righteousness,
The great unchangeable I AM,
King of glory and of grace,
One in Himself I cannot die.
My soul is purchased by His blood,
My life is hid with Christ on high,
With Christ my Savior and my God!

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0150. Spiritual Gifts (2008.0427)

As usual, Pastor Wei asked whoever returned to Vancouver must brought spiritual gifts. After my vacation ends, someone asked me what I had shared. What I prepared was not exactly what I said and I couldn't remember exactly what I said either. So this post will list the points I had prepared.

1. Expert = Earnest (Take seriously)
. Day April 26th of Daily Manna by Hans R. Waldvogel: Lots of people fail in the crisis times in their lives because they are not stored with the Word.
. Starting from May 5th of 2005, I, together with sisters in the church, memorize Bible verses. We use the must-remember list from Pastor Tsao. We test each other each Sunday though we may postpone for some situations.
. I used to memorize Bible verses while commuting, before I moved to current location.
. Also listening to God's word while working.

2. Recently, we are talking about victorious life in Shi-Lin
. See things as none of my business; I will not be affected whatever others have been.
. Do not play or do business with God, but God does play chess with us.
. What are the principles which I should hold firmly and not altered easily - Those principles will reduce the misunderstanding and confusion of understanding God's will.
. Bitterness is drinking the poison myself and waiting for my opposite to die.
. Our past is like our own museum. There are quite a few things we lock in the storage room cause we didn't want people to see them. Usually, those locked in the storage are the moments that we don't want to remember. However, those memories will escape from the storage room from time to time. Those memories do not have power over us when we can put them into the show room for others to appreciate. If we want to get away those memories, the fastest way is replacing them with new and beautiful memories.

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0149. On Vacation

I don't feel like writing blog?! Not sure if it is because I haven't written for a while.

Finally, I am on two-week vacation. Last time, it was well over an year. But Vancouver is surprisingly chilly. I heard this April has record low temperature. It even snowed on the night I arrived in Vancourver. My mom said Vancouver welcome me with snow. There is a big weather gap between Taipei and Vancouver. It was hard to decide what clothings to take with me. I am glad I throw in few winter clothing at the last minute, since the suit case had some more room. The only thing that I regret I didn't bring with me is my long boots.

Everyone here asks me whether and when I will be moving back. Well, I would like to but God hasn't given me a clear signal yet. So wait for another while. In the next few days, I will visit my prof and a software company. They also plan a hiking over weekend. Rest of time, besides some personal to-do, I hope to read a bit. Two weeks fly fast.

And right now, I have a little hard to sleep at mid-night. Time difference is just not easy to adjust.

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0148. Kingdom of Heaven is ...

[Notes of Sermon] Parables of kingdom of heaven

Scripture：Matt. 13：31-33，44-46

. Kingdom of heaven starts from small
. Kingdom of heaven requires taking root in a long term
. The rule of growing faith
. Invisible influence

. Change the life that was dry and hard
. Prayer - is generator
. Wait on God
. Love

. The value of kingdom of heaven is hidden
. The value of kingdom of heaven is discoverable
. Kingdom of heaven is worthy at any price with joy
. Kingdom of heaven is the most beautiful

Rev 21：10-22：2
. Bright and pure
. Discriminable
. Rooted with fundation which will not be shaken
. Ordered
. diverse and abundant
. Glorious
. Satisfiable and healing

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0147. Having Fun

Just two working days after Chinese New year break, I already taking days off to have fun. Well, of course I got invitation from someone else otherwise I will be in the office! But I am not used to go out with those who do not have to work and no plan. It is a challenge to me since I have to work. It was good there was a overall plan, otherwise I couldn't stand it.

We went to Tainan visiting two historic spots and some local foods. But the foods are not what I heard from TV or magazines. Local people took us to dine different taste. We stayed at a friend's apartment in Kaohsiung. The next day, we went to National Museum of Marine Biology and Aquarium. Because the long distance, we only had half day over there. It was not enough! I want more. So I will find another chance to go there. The third day, I took a long walk around the Love River in Kaohsiung and then headed home first.

I think I should travel with plan myself. I can see my future trips includes Tainan local foods that I didn't get to have this time and visitor attractions, National Museum of Marine Biology and Aquarium, and other visitor attractions in Kaohsiung.

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0146. Winter Conference Notes

Time: Feb. 7-11, 2008
Location: Christ's College
Theme: Kingdom of Heaven

. Verse of 2008 is Heb 12:28 - Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe,
. Read God's word earnestly, remember and think through
. When does the God's kingdom start? Pentecost
. Must have fountain
. Sing more
. Our king is full of power and authority, as well as love, moreover a friend.
. Let heavenly glory in every morning
. God's kingdom is not matter of eating, drinking, and words but of righteousness, peace, joy in the Holy Spirit and power.
. God's kingdom brings healing
. God's kingdom is from least to many, from small to large, from point to all, narrow entrance (Mat 13:18-23, 31-32, 33, Lk 18:24-30）
. God's kingdom can not be observed by eyes but sits within our hearts
. Is God your king?
. What we obey is what rule over us
. Never think you are important
. Just near Him, sit beside Him
. Make Him happy as in love

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0145. Out of Immunity

Mom and Dad came. The days are a little mix-up. One thing which doesn't change after I worked at Taiwan is this: I can't the nag. I am totally out of immunity when it comes to nag. So, it has been arguements, more nagging, then silence. Communication level is at very low end.
I am wondering that I am only an unfinished work. Why always measure me with the final product standard?

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0144. Work Swirl (18)

After New Year, the big news is the division of I was with had changes. The software planning team I stay with is now moved under product marketing. There are not much changes at this point. Work to do or the process is about the same. I didn't change my seat either. The other day, a colleague just realize my team is reviewing everything from the beginning to the end. As for myself, I wish to contribute more useful data in this year.

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0143. New Year Resolution

(I kept posponting writing this blog cause I wasn't sure whether to post everything. After two weeks of struggles, here it is.)

The verse of the year:
"He who overcomes will inherit all this, and I will be his God and he will be my son." (Rev. 21:7)

While attending the prayer meeting at the New Year Eve, Pastor Tsao asked us to think and write down the questions below:
Anything you would like to wrestle this year?
A. Pray for myself
1. Taking thing more seriously
a. including devotion, prayer, service, exercise
b. overcome laziness, both spiritually & physically
2. My reaction to things happening: more relax and from the eyes of the LORD
3. Focus and Concentrate
4. Less criticism and more appreciation

B. Pray for my family
1. Parents - Health
2. Michael & Mei - Bless their work and life, Know the LORD
3. David - Deeper exerience Jesus
4. Grandma - Health, Richer in grace (tongue)
5. Cousin Cindy - Deeper exerience Jesus
6. All others - Bless them and knowning Christ

C. Pray for my study, work and church services
1. Service - humbleness
2. Work - Kindness & gentleness in tongue, focus and conecentrate, more serious

D. New year resolution
See above.

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